The other thing that really helped me in this scene is something that Chandra said to me about characterizing early. I've always been a bit afraid to head into emotional territory too soon with my lead characters, but I don't know exactly why. It doesn't really make sense; when done well, that can actually make characters much more accepted by the reader. Normally I tend to hold back a bit at the start of my books, but this time I've really let the internals of the characters present themselves much more quickly--and I really like the result.
9,035 / 95,000 (9.5%)